Val and Hal
It is 2030, and Val is
standing at Boots Corner as usual. A man approaches her.
"Val - Which way to Imperial Circus?". "That way, sir;
first on the right", Val replies - as one of her arms
lights up.
Yes, Val is an
Intelligent Street Assistant - a successor to Alexa. She
does far more than give directions; ask her who won the
Gold Cup in 1955 and she will answer "Gay Donald, at 33
to 1" without a moments hesitation. The only request
that she doesn't like much is "Val - Tell me a joke"!
All she asks of the Borough Council is Joe's visit to
change her battery and give her a quick anti-viral wipe
over. Of course she and the other ISAs are controlled
remotely by wireless and can report incidents. Her
robotics and satellite navigation facilitate a "Roving
Mode', which allows her to tour the town centre
systematically, returning to Boots Corner at night. And
Val's 'neural engine' gives her 'human' reactions and
initiatives. She worries that any sign of irregular
behaviour could mean a one-way trip to the recycling
centre at Swindon Road!
Hal, another ISA, stands
on the opposite corner when he is not 'roving'. Val can
often hear the conversations with Hal, and is sometimes
quite tempted to intervene with some extra bit of
information to show that men don't know everything - but
of course she can't!
They are always kept
pretty busy giving directions during the day because the
Council has, somewhat controversially, tidied our
Regency town by removing the clutter of posts and signs.
And of course the ISAs are popular with children, who
ask them all sorts of silly questions.
It can be cold and
boring for Val in the small hours. Sleep has not been
programmed in. But one fine moonlit night Val was most
surprised to hear Hal call across: " Val - let's go up
to Pittville Pump Room; I've never been there"
And he continued "I know
you can't reply - yet. But Joe forgot to log me out
today. So I can do anything I want to - and not only
that, I've got your password here. Wait while I unlock
you and turn your activity-logging off."
"Val Login ISAVal
zcy6$78QW8k>M Return Logging/Off Return" he intoned.
Well, it worked! Val
found herself in 'self-control' roving mode, saw Hal
gliding away up North Street, cried "Whoopee" and
followed him.
What an adventure!
Fortunately no-one had seen them. But when Joe came
first thing in the morning he noticed her battery was
unusually flat. That could have meant 'Swindon Road' for
Val, but he shrugged his shoulders and made no report.
Later a small child came up to Val: "Val - where do you
go at night?". Well, Val cannot tell a lie - or even be
'economical with the truth'.
Her program does not permit it. So she answered "Last
night I went to Pittville Pump Room with Hal".
Fortunately no-one took any notice. Phew! But across the
road, Hal silently muttered :
"Women!".
DAVID CAWSEY
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